When I think about the day I started this blog, I think about Wilson, Wyoming. I was a nanny and adventuring in the wild west. I had been dating Adam for several months, and I was smitten (not to mention that he was as well.) I lived in a little loft- sharing it with a roommate. And, I worked two jobs- Jackson Hole Mountain resort in the kids rental shop.
I had so many adventures in the mountains. I learned to hike in for skiing and downhill ski at the sickest mountain. Every night I came home smelling like formula, and Adam and I made meals after our work days. Adam lived out of his truck for months until he moved everything across the country to our apartment.
I think about in the nearly 7 years that I've been dating Adam how much fun we had and how many things I've learned. Plus, how many sweet destinations to which we've traveled together. I knew back then that Adam was special, but I probably didn't quite see that he would be my husband or the father of my children. I think it's amazing that we grew up rather close in proximity, but we had to both move almost two thousand miles away to meet each other. To have our first dance on the Fourth of July, and to learn how wonderful love, real genuine love, can be.
I think a lot about us- and relationships, and I seemingly try to be thankful and appreciative of our blessings. My blessing in him and our daughter and, now, our future child. We all know that every relationship takes work, but I have to say, some of my favorite moments are still just us. I get so excited for date nights, and our time just being us. It gets challenging with the daily do's to keep it husband and wife or "boyfriend and girlfriend." But, those little date nights even when we're tired to just talk and be fun are so important and special.
I married a man with a free spirit- someone who loves to travel but also loves to work and work hard. He has a great sense of humor and makes me laugh. The one thing about me- is that I am also free-spirited and I have a hard time staying stagnant, in one place. I've adjusted but the last year was so significant for me. I feel as though I can carry those hikes/places/ people with me for a while without feeling like I need to get out of Missouri. I get to be more free (with my time) now too since I work part time. That is also a significant change since I have always worked sometimes two jobs at once.
Basically, my 100th post is dedicated to Adam, my husband. He supports me in whatever endeavor or dream that I have, and he genuinely has a love for me like I've never felt. He encourages me to go for my dreams, being a writer, and gives me the space that I enjoy to think and play and be. We've been through hard things together, and it could be easy to dwell on the hard/difficult stuff. I know we've had moments where it seemed insurmountable.
Either way, we kept hiking forward and through some darkness. I hope that we continue hand in hand because it's so much easier together. There are no words for my appreciation and love for you. All I can say is that you mean so much to me and I am better with you.
Thursday, May 29, 2014
Saturday, May 24, 2014
Memorial Day
This holiday has a new significance for me this year. I love my country- I love the USA, and I feel that we are blessed. Probably too much with the convenience of anything we want or need at our disposal. We have a huge responsibility to each other to not to abuse this priviledge; however, we do.
Here's the thing: This experience at my Dad's funeral- receiving the flag was a moment in my life that I was proud to be an American. Proud to know my father served our country, and I gained a new appreciation for the country I was born and raised. We get so caught up in the battles that we forget we are given land, land to live in, land to have fun and play. We have accessible jobs, and we live on more than $2.00 a day- the amount of money people in real poverty stricken nations live on.
My Dad's casket was draped with this flag. And, we he was removed from the hertz, the soldiers saluted him. I was designated to receive the flag- and I knew this. But, the true beauty of the ceremonious practices just maintained a high regard for those who served, and the words spoken to me from the president of the United States were clear and respectful.
Taps- gets me every time- as if I wasn't already balling. And, the service men folded the flag, which I didn't know had so much significance. I found this online: http://www.legion.org/flag/folding Incredible. I also wanted to know what to do with the flag. It's been sitting in our living room on our ottoman greeting us as we walk in everyday, and I wanted to make sure I was treating it with respect.
The funeral practices with the military opened my eyes to a real military. It's not the one we see on the news- not the one that seems so distant. It became real to me. It became a thing that I am utmost appreciative.
The flag is hanging appropriately in the front of our house. And, I LOVE IT! It's just a real reminder of America- the people who make it up. The people who love our country and die for our country- who serve our country. When I've travelled outside of the US, returning home to American soil is familiar. It's home.
Being at the funeral, and facing east- we had a moment as we were in our final prayers to lie my Dad to rest, and this breeze- I mean a noticeable, beautiful, Holy Spirit breeze swept across us. It was, to me, Dad's final touch- as if he was pleased by all that was said and done. Maybe it's my imagination, but it felt so real. It was a real moment. A final signoff.
Here's the thing- maybe you're tired of reading about stuff like this. Stuff that's sad, or hard, or sad. But, I'm moved to write. It's been the best advice I've been given so far. So, sorry it's sad. But, you know what, there are seasons. And, I'm in this season. So, know that I'm genuinely happy- but, I've got to trudge through this writing with you/crying with you/smiling with you.
Anyway, this year, I'm thankful to be American. I'm glad to know all of you who served. And, Thank you.
Here's the thing: This experience at my Dad's funeral- receiving the flag was a moment in my life that I was proud to be an American. Proud to know my father served our country, and I gained a new appreciation for the country I was born and raised. We get so caught up in the battles that we forget we are given land, land to live in, land to have fun and play. We have accessible jobs, and we live on more than $2.00 a day- the amount of money people in real poverty stricken nations live on.
My Dad's casket was draped with this flag. And, we he was removed from the hertz, the soldiers saluted him. I was designated to receive the flag- and I knew this. But, the true beauty of the ceremonious practices just maintained a high regard for those who served, and the words spoken to me from the president of the United States were clear and respectful.
Taps- gets me every time- as if I wasn't already balling. And, the service men folded the flag, which I didn't know had so much significance. I found this online: http://www.legion.org/flag/folding Incredible. I also wanted to know what to do with the flag. It's been sitting in our living room on our ottoman greeting us as we walk in everyday, and I wanted to make sure I was treating it with respect.
The funeral practices with the military opened my eyes to a real military. It's not the one we see on the news- not the one that seems so distant. It became real to me. It became a thing that I am utmost appreciative.
The flag is hanging appropriately in the front of our house. And, I LOVE IT! It's just a real reminder of America- the people who make it up. The people who love our country and die for our country- who serve our country. When I've travelled outside of the US, returning home to American soil is familiar. It's home.
Being at the funeral, and facing east- we had a moment as we were in our final prayers to lie my Dad to rest, and this breeze- I mean a noticeable, beautiful, Holy Spirit breeze swept across us. It was, to me, Dad's final touch- as if he was pleased by all that was said and done. Maybe it's my imagination, but it felt so real. It was a real moment. A final signoff.
Here's the thing- maybe you're tired of reading about stuff like this. Stuff that's sad, or hard, or sad. But, I'm moved to write. It's been the best advice I've been given so far. So, sorry it's sad. But, you know what, there are seasons. And, I'm in this season. So, know that I'm genuinely happy- but, I've got to trudge through this writing with you/crying with you/smiling with you.
Anyway, this year, I'm thankful to be American. I'm glad to know all of you who served. And, Thank you.
Friday, May 23, 2014
Grief and other words
Hello, you. I'm really sorry about not writing. I have a couple of posts that I wrote, and I didn't publish. I have had quite the year- 2014 has been interesting and challenging. It seems strange to refer to this year as passing so quickly, yet it has. And, there has been great joy and great sadness. I haven't put my feelings on my blog- probably because I wasn't ready and also because I feel like this process is something that I'm really struggling.
Let me say this. I feel like I should write a book. I feel like I have a wonderful testament to someone who has to be alone dealing with the death of a parent. And, I don't mean that I don't have support, but I do feel as though I am the single only person who feels waves of grief with few people to talk to. The most interesting part of this is that I have found the most comfort in the most unlikely of places. I should say: My dad died from pancreatic cancer 4 months after being diagnosed. It was so swift- there aren't words to describe some of the feelings of the few days I had left to call, talk, and see my dad. A really unfortunate thing that people don't talk about is how, no matter the scenario, you'll feel some guilt. And, your mind will replay the last day over, over, over, over, and over again.
No matter how other people think you did- or think you are doing- it's just you, alone, to deal with your feelings. And, after the funeral, let me tell you is even more.
I do feel that my dad, Barry Evan Sterling, was an amazing person (really! I'm sure every daughter does who has a good relationship with their dad.) since his life was so interesting. My dad was born in Washington, D.C. and his parents divorced. He has an older brother, and my dad was in Maryland until he was 17 when my uncle who went to University of Memphis came to get him. He was skipping school- going to museums and being with his girlfriend. Ultimately, he left Maryland and came to Memphis and graduated from Messick high school in Memphis. He later left and started college at Mississippi College, but he didn't finish there. My dad went into the army, and did especially well there. He returned to Memphis and he and my uncle started the Sterling Realtors Company where they had a hand in nearly all real estate through the 1970's. They were a power-house together- both my uncle and my dad were in the multi-million dollar real estate sales club, and they were successful in the Tennessee Legislature. My dad overtook the chair in the legislature that my uncle had preceded for four terms. He held the seat for 3 terms. And in that time, he was also nominated and served as a delegate for the Constitutional Convention where he traveled to Europe and I'm assuming discussed world politics and such.
There's a story behind this part of his life, that I'm not very educated. My dad had a first wife, adopted a son, and also travelled back and forth to Nashville often during this time. The in's and out's, I'm mostly unaware, but I do know that my dad loved the family life which I will discuss more later.
In the 1980's, my dad dated and eventually married and met my mother. Prior to this, he had a relationship who would be the love of his life (hindsight is 20/20.), and he maintained a relationship with this woman til the very end. They didn't marry for several reasons, but children being one of those reasons. And, without this marriage to my mom, I wouldn't have been the daughter to an amazing human.
My first memories are in Williston at our house on Ebenezer Loop. It was called Deja Vu. My dad was the stay-at- home parent, and I don't remember much of my life without him. They built an addition to this old home. My grandmother (Helen who passed last Feb) lived right next door, and my mother's parents lived about 10 minutes from our home. This homestead was seemingly a beautiful home and he created it the way he liked it. He would do this one other time, but Deja Vu was the home of a lifetime. We had a garden, a beautiful back porch. A gazebo, horses and cows, and even a cupola. My childhood was good there. My dad started a Christian radio station in Somerville, and I spent the house after pre-school dancing there. It's no longer there, but it was where the Somerville bank and trust is on the square in Somerville now. My dad drove his 1980 Chevrolet custom deluxe truck my entire life- as long as it wasn't being worked on.
This truck is seriously a tank. My brother and my dad would drive down Ebenezer Loop- my brother hanging on the step-side jumping off to get trash. And, eventually, I would do the same. I thought it was so cool. She was "Brown Betty," and Dad would come pick me up at school in it, and I would be almost mortified. Also, we took a trip to St. Louis in it, in one day, and those were the times where gas was $.75. We went to the arch and to the Anheuser Busch brewery. We didn't get home until so late, but looking back, he loved that day. We would visit Arkansas in it, and drive around Memphis. For my graduation from high school, my dad gave me the truck, and on my way home, something happened. I didn't make it home. But it was sweet! Eventually, I returned it back to Dad, and he continued to use it. It never was very far away- and my dad bought it brand new from the dealership with the options he wanted. No electric windows... three in the tree, etc. Now, it's part of me and it's just a reminder of all of the daily tasks he did.
As I grew up, we had our outs, but having my dad's relationship was very valuable. When I was a senior in college, I would invite Dad to our apartment where I would make a lunch or Sunday afternoon dinner. He enjoyed it. When I moved to Wyoming, I called Dad as much as I could. It was pretty much his idea from the beginning to work at a National park. And, I know he wasn't always glad I was so far away, I know he was glad to hear about my adventures. My experience with travel was always with him -significant travel anyway. In sixth grade, we went to Paris and New York City. Earlier that that, we went to Washington, DC. My love of travel was ignited by these trips
and it hasn't ceased to exist.
Before my teaching stent in Chile, my dad and I had date nights on Friday nights during my 3 months at home. And, for me, this is one of my best memories. My dad was a fantastic cook, and I begged him to make me meals. I think I made one at that time, and he wasn't impressed. He often critiqued my cooking, but he was a gourmet. I'm talking so good. I'll miss that a lot.
We had some awesome times here in St. Louis too. He came to see my first apartment here, and my first house. He walked me down the isle and gave me away. Last summer, He drove Ryan and I to my sister-in-law's house in Searcy, Arkansas. And, my father celebrated his 70th birthday here in my house in St. Louis.
In a nutshell, quick version, this is how we spent our short time. My dad was 41 when he had me, and looking at it now, it seems so short. This is hard for me to say: I could have gone another decade with my dad. I called my Dad every day for the last four months, and some days, there were no words. Just checking in- there would be times I wouldn't know he was in the hospital. I could hear in his voice sometimes that he was hurting. I spent three weeks in Memphis in February, and he was pretty sick. Dad was in the hospital for a few days, and I was so sick with this pregnancy. We had some nice talks and Ryan spent some time with him.
I asked my dad about this job offer that I had, and I didn't realize it then. But, it would be the last advice I would ask him for. And, of course, I'm glad I did. My dad entered the hospital on Apr. 5, and I didn't get to talk to him for days. It was excruciating, and just hearing his voice a few days later- I wept with gladness. I would come down thru Memphis, the next Saturday and we would spend some hours talking and hugging. Our last photo would be taken this weekend.
My dad had a stent place in January from his pancreas to his liver. A duct was blocked causing jaundice and pain. This is when they fully discovered the mass in the pancreas that metastasized to the liver. During our visit this Saturday in April, it was found that the stent has caused sepsis, and either we could elect to replace the stent or not. My dad elected it, and it was an unsuccessful procedure. The cancer was so overgrown they couldn't reach the location of the stent. And, this was the beginning of the end. My dad seemed fine with the decision to do the procedure, and gave me peace about us continuing on the trip to Gulf Shores. So we went... and came back early.
This next part is hard for me to write- because it's a life. And, I made decisions about life. I knew what Dad wanted. After the unsuccessful procedure, my dad's kidneys stopped functioning correctly. His lungs started filling up with fluid. As soon as I heard this, we came to Memphis to the hospital. When I got there, I couldn't rouse my dad. I spoke to him and held his hand- then a wonderful nurse woke him up. And, then, I cried.
I gave the ultimate news, that he would be going to see the Lord. (let me say this now, going through this without knowing Jesus, and the Lord, for me would have been impossible.) I told him I wasn't ready to say good-bye. And, he said, "You don't have to." The next day, I would talk to the doctors, who really aren't that helpful- and told them just to make him comfortable. That afternoon he went on the palliative care floor. His voice continued to wither and he only wanted to drink apple juice. That evening, Adam and I went to visit, and he gave some last pieces of advice. Adam and I went to Good Friday service, were I was so sad.
At six am the next morning, I got up, bought some apple juice, and went to the hospital. I held his hand in the quiet eerie room, shook him to try to rouse him, and he looked at me for the last time. He wasn't able to communicate. His skin hot, and his mouth open gasping for air, I kissed him and hugged him. I spoke with the nurse, and I went outside. I sat in my car, praying out loud to God. My Lord was with me, his presence in the car with me. And, God answered my prayer. He took my dad 45 minutes later.
And, it was the Saturday between Good Friday and Easter. The next week I would speak at his funeral, and I would learn about many people who loved Dad and he loved.
It's been a month, and things kind of fall off. People move on, and things get easier, but I still miss him. Grief is a very powerful emotion, but I want to write this. I can't explain to you how important love is, and how love can overcome anything. The love that I felt from my dad is something that is special. And, if you can, show an amazing love to those you love. Life is so short, and we seems to forget that. As for a parent, you are an extension of them. Remember that they aren't perfect, but now, being a parent, they love you so much. Even if they aren't perfect.... just know that they love you. And, show them you love them. If there is hurt or pain, forgive, forgive, forgive. Love can heal all wounds.
This is for you, Dad.
Let me say this. I feel like I should write a book. I feel like I have a wonderful testament to someone who has to be alone dealing with the death of a parent. And, I don't mean that I don't have support, but I do feel as though I am the single only person who feels waves of grief with few people to talk to. The most interesting part of this is that I have found the most comfort in the most unlikely of places. I should say: My dad died from pancreatic cancer 4 months after being diagnosed. It was so swift- there aren't words to describe some of the feelings of the few days I had left to call, talk, and see my dad. A really unfortunate thing that people don't talk about is how, no matter the scenario, you'll feel some guilt. And, your mind will replay the last day over, over, over, over, and over again.
No matter how other people think you did- or think you are doing- it's just you, alone, to deal with your feelings. And, after the funeral, let me tell you is even more.
I do feel that my dad, Barry Evan Sterling, was an amazing person (really! I'm sure every daughter does who has a good relationship with their dad.) since his life was so interesting. My dad was born in Washington, D.C. and his parents divorced. He has an older brother, and my dad was in Maryland until he was 17 when my uncle who went to University of Memphis came to get him. He was skipping school- going to museums and being with his girlfriend. Ultimately, he left Maryland and came to Memphis and graduated from Messick high school in Memphis. He later left and started college at Mississippi College, but he didn't finish there. My dad went into the army, and did especially well there. He returned to Memphis and he and my uncle started the Sterling Realtors Company where they had a hand in nearly all real estate through the 1970's. They were a power-house together- both my uncle and my dad were in the multi-million dollar real estate sales club, and they were successful in the Tennessee Legislature. My dad overtook the chair in the legislature that my uncle had preceded for four terms. He held the seat for 3 terms. And in that time, he was also nominated and served as a delegate for the Constitutional Convention where he traveled to Europe and I'm assuming discussed world politics and such.
There's a story behind this part of his life, that I'm not very educated. My dad had a first wife, adopted a son, and also travelled back and forth to Nashville often during this time. The in's and out's, I'm mostly unaware, but I do know that my dad loved the family life which I will discuss more later.
In the 1980's, my dad dated and eventually married and met my mother. Prior to this, he had a relationship who would be the love of his life (hindsight is 20/20.), and he maintained a relationship with this woman til the very end. They didn't marry for several reasons, but children being one of those reasons. And, without this marriage to my mom, I wouldn't have been the daughter to an amazing human.
My first memories are in Williston at our house on Ebenezer Loop. It was called Deja Vu. My dad was the stay-at- home parent, and I don't remember much of my life without him. They built an addition to this old home. My grandmother (Helen who passed last Feb) lived right next door, and my mother's parents lived about 10 minutes from our home. This homestead was seemingly a beautiful home and he created it the way he liked it. He would do this one other time, but Deja Vu was the home of a lifetime. We had a garden, a beautiful back porch. A gazebo, horses and cows, and even a cupola. My childhood was good there. My dad started a Christian radio station in Somerville, and I spent the house after pre-school dancing there. It's no longer there, but it was where the Somerville bank and trust is on the square in Somerville now. My dad drove his 1980 Chevrolet custom deluxe truck my entire life- as long as it wasn't being worked on.
This truck is seriously a tank. My brother and my dad would drive down Ebenezer Loop- my brother hanging on the step-side jumping off to get trash. And, eventually, I would do the same. I thought it was so cool. She was "Brown Betty," and Dad would come pick me up at school in it, and I would be almost mortified. Also, we took a trip to St. Louis in it, in one day, and those were the times where gas was $.75. We went to the arch and to the Anheuser Busch brewery. We didn't get home until so late, but looking back, he loved that day. We would visit Arkansas in it, and drive around Memphis. For my graduation from high school, my dad gave me the truck, and on my way home, something happened. I didn't make it home. But it was sweet! Eventually, I returned it back to Dad, and he continued to use it. It never was very far away- and my dad bought it brand new from the dealership with the options he wanted. No electric windows... three in the tree, etc. Now, it's part of me and it's just a reminder of all of the daily tasks he did.
As I grew up, we had our outs, but having my dad's relationship was very valuable. When I was a senior in college, I would invite Dad to our apartment where I would make a lunch or Sunday afternoon dinner. He enjoyed it. When I moved to Wyoming, I called Dad as much as I could. It was pretty much his idea from the beginning to work at a National park. And, I know he wasn't always glad I was so far away, I know he was glad to hear about my adventures. My experience with travel was always with him -significant travel anyway. In sixth grade, we went to Paris and New York City. Earlier that that, we went to Washington, DC. My love of travel was ignited by these trips
and it hasn't ceased to exist.
Before my teaching stent in Chile, my dad and I had date nights on Friday nights during my 3 months at home. And, for me, this is one of my best memories. My dad was a fantastic cook, and I begged him to make me meals. I think I made one at that time, and he wasn't impressed. He often critiqued my cooking, but he was a gourmet. I'm talking so good. I'll miss that a lot.
We had some awesome times here in St. Louis too. He came to see my first apartment here, and my first house. He walked me down the isle and gave me away. Last summer, He drove Ryan and I to my sister-in-law's house in Searcy, Arkansas. And, my father celebrated his 70th birthday here in my house in St. Louis.
In a nutshell, quick version, this is how we spent our short time. My dad was 41 when he had me, and looking at it now, it seems so short. This is hard for me to say: I could have gone another decade with my dad. I called my Dad every day for the last four months, and some days, there were no words. Just checking in- there would be times I wouldn't know he was in the hospital. I could hear in his voice sometimes that he was hurting. I spent three weeks in Memphis in February, and he was pretty sick. Dad was in the hospital for a few days, and I was so sick with this pregnancy. We had some nice talks and Ryan spent some time with him.
I asked my dad about this job offer that I had, and I didn't realize it then. But, it would be the last advice I would ask him for. And, of course, I'm glad I did. My dad entered the hospital on Apr. 5, and I didn't get to talk to him for days. It was excruciating, and just hearing his voice a few days later- I wept with gladness. I would come down thru Memphis, the next Saturday and we would spend some hours talking and hugging. Our last photo would be taken this weekend.
My dad had a stent place in January from his pancreas to his liver. A duct was blocked causing jaundice and pain. This is when they fully discovered the mass in the pancreas that metastasized to the liver. During our visit this Saturday in April, it was found that the stent has caused sepsis, and either we could elect to replace the stent or not. My dad elected it, and it was an unsuccessful procedure. The cancer was so overgrown they couldn't reach the location of the stent. And, this was the beginning of the end. My dad seemed fine with the decision to do the procedure, and gave me peace about us continuing on the trip to Gulf Shores. So we went... and came back early.
This next part is hard for me to write- because it's a life. And, I made decisions about life. I knew what Dad wanted. After the unsuccessful procedure, my dad's kidneys stopped functioning correctly. His lungs started filling up with fluid. As soon as I heard this, we came to Memphis to the hospital. When I got there, I couldn't rouse my dad. I spoke to him and held his hand- then a wonderful nurse woke him up. And, then, I cried.
I gave the ultimate news, that he would be going to see the Lord. (let me say this now, going through this without knowing Jesus, and the Lord, for me would have been impossible.) I told him I wasn't ready to say good-bye. And, he said, "You don't have to." The next day, I would talk to the doctors, who really aren't that helpful- and told them just to make him comfortable. That afternoon he went on the palliative care floor. His voice continued to wither and he only wanted to drink apple juice. That evening, Adam and I went to visit, and he gave some last pieces of advice. Adam and I went to Good Friday service, were I was so sad.
At six am the next morning, I got up, bought some apple juice, and went to the hospital. I held his hand in the quiet eerie room, shook him to try to rouse him, and he looked at me for the last time. He wasn't able to communicate. His skin hot, and his mouth open gasping for air, I kissed him and hugged him. I spoke with the nurse, and I went outside. I sat in my car, praying out loud to God. My Lord was with me, his presence in the car with me. And, God answered my prayer. He took my dad 45 minutes later.
And, it was the Saturday between Good Friday and Easter. The next week I would speak at his funeral, and I would learn about many people who loved Dad and he loved.
It's been a month, and things kind of fall off. People move on, and things get easier, but I still miss him. Grief is a very powerful emotion, but I want to write this. I can't explain to you how important love is, and how love can overcome anything. The love that I felt from my dad is something that is special. And, if you can, show an amazing love to those you love. Life is so short, and we seems to forget that. As for a parent, you are an extension of them. Remember that they aren't perfect, but now, being a parent, they love you so much. Even if they aren't perfect.... just know that they love you. And, show them you love them. If there is hurt or pain, forgive, forgive, forgive. Love can heal all wounds.
This is for you, Dad.
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Relying on God, the Father
Hello. Blog. It's been a long time. My life is changed again. I have been thinking of writing very often, but I didn't know when the right time would reveal itself. But, here it is. The last few months have been challenging in new, wonderful and terrible ways.
We had some lovely holidays, and on New Year's Day, I discovered that I was/am pregnant. And, we're thrilled. Although that creates it's own challenges, I'm looking forward to having our second child. And, I'm 16 weeks along, and happy to be out of the first trimester. I can only say/write thankful things as it was absolutely delightful compared to my pregnancy with Ryan. So, we're heading for a new bundle of joy, and I'm so grateful to be blessed with another gift from God. All healthy so far, and my journey this time is planning on being much changed from my first. No hospital, no doctor (persay), and no interventions. I'm definitely scared, but I believe this will be an amazing experience for my second time around.
Not two weeks later after this, we discovered that my dad had a mass in his pancreas. And, he was later diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. I was in shock and sad as well as finding myself in a great deal of prayer to God. God, Jesus, and the holy spirit- And, a visit followed to Tennessee whereas new challenges and difficulties surfaced. Seeing my dad suffering and starving for life is so hard. And, as I've seen cancer in another loved one, I'm worried and scared for my Dad.
So far, that's what I feel I can write. But, all in all, I'm thankful. I'm happy that I have my dad to call and talk to when I need. And, I am in need of writing- to express all these things inside my head. So, here's to a start.
We had some lovely holidays, and on New Year's Day, I discovered that I was/am pregnant. And, we're thrilled. Although that creates it's own challenges, I'm looking forward to having our second child. And, I'm 16 weeks along, and happy to be out of the first trimester. I can only say/write thankful things as it was absolutely delightful compared to my pregnancy with Ryan. So, we're heading for a new bundle of joy, and I'm so grateful to be blessed with another gift from God. All healthy so far, and my journey this time is planning on being much changed from my first. No hospital, no doctor (persay), and no interventions. I'm definitely scared, but I believe this will be an amazing experience for my second time around.
Not two weeks later after this, we discovered that my dad had a mass in his pancreas. And, he was later diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. I was in shock and sad as well as finding myself in a great deal of prayer to God. God, Jesus, and the holy spirit- And, a visit followed to Tennessee whereas new challenges and difficulties surfaced. Seeing my dad suffering and starving for life is so hard. And, as I've seen cancer in another loved one, I'm worried and scared for my Dad.
So far, that's what I feel I can write. But, all in all, I'm thankful. I'm happy that I have my dad to call and talk to when I need. And, I am in need of writing- to express all these things inside my head. So, here's to a start.
Wednesday, October 23, 2013
Planning for our Departure and Arrival
I have some plans in the works. I have come to the conclusion that I am a busy body. I have recently noticed that my husband and I work well together because we motivate each other. I've been racking my brain over things I can do to improve my life and my overall situation. I recently was pressed to try something new, and take a chance to do something I love: Cook.
Well, I do love to cook, but I also love to entertain. And, I'm taking on a challenge by hosting a home cooking class at my house (that is still in the middle of a remodel). I'm opening myself up for people to see my life, but I'm also trying to move to do something that I love. I have been cooking for a long time. I don't have cooking credentials, but I do have experience. I have been published twice for my recipes as a child: 1. Zucchini Spaghetti and 2. High-Hat Lobster Bisque. I have been ravenous through cookbooks and read many magazines with which I experiment. I have read thousands of cooking blogs, and I own many cookbooks. The biggest thing that I have discovered since we've been travelling is that I don't even need cookbooks anymore. I'm sure that my repertoire of recipes was essential to me finally discovering my ability to find textures and flavors that I love.
On November 4, I am hosting a home cooking class at my home. It's a super cheap way to have a meal, but also to encourage those who cook every night to try new, interesting recipes. I had mentioned this idea to my husband months ago, but he seemed to think it wasn't a good idea at the time. As a result, I decided to wait, and I have found that this is the right time for such an event.
I have taken several cooking classes. One of which was from the Viking Culinary Institute in Memphis and the others have been in various locations. The most significant experience that I draw from often is my travel. When traveling, I go to local markets, prepare food inside or outside on little equipment, and devour delicious meals. I have noted these meals and chronicled the cooking I have done in Chile, Europe, and across the United States. I hope to encourage others to continue to have family meals and to spend time together around the dinner table. This is something I am very passionate about since I did not grow up having meals around the home dinner table. And I am very opinionated about it because currently in my life it is so important.
Some of you may be reading this and not live in the St. Louis area- I hope to post the recipes that I use on the November 4 cooking class here. If you have questions, email me or facebook me. I'm a huge believer in NOT spending all day in the kitchen, but I do believe in healthy, accessible meals with whole food ingredients... no HFCS, no highly processed foods.
Thanks for reading, y'all! It's going to be a good November.
Well, I do love to cook, but I also love to entertain. And, I'm taking on a challenge by hosting a home cooking class at my house (that is still in the middle of a remodel). I'm opening myself up for people to see my life, but I'm also trying to move to do something that I love. I have been cooking for a long time. I don't have cooking credentials, but I do have experience. I have been published twice for my recipes as a child: 1. Zucchini Spaghetti and 2. High-Hat Lobster Bisque. I have been ravenous through cookbooks and read many magazines with which I experiment. I have read thousands of cooking blogs, and I own many cookbooks. The biggest thing that I have discovered since we've been travelling is that I don't even need cookbooks anymore. I'm sure that my repertoire of recipes was essential to me finally discovering my ability to find textures and flavors that I love.
On November 4, I am hosting a home cooking class at my home. It's a super cheap way to have a meal, but also to encourage those who cook every night to try new, interesting recipes. I had mentioned this idea to my husband months ago, but he seemed to think it wasn't a good idea at the time. As a result, I decided to wait, and I have found that this is the right time for such an event.
I have taken several cooking classes. One of which was from the Viking Culinary Institute in Memphis and the others have been in various locations. The most significant experience that I draw from often is my travel. When traveling, I go to local markets, prepare food inside or outside on little equipment, and devour delicious meals. I have noted these meals and chronicled the cooking I have done in Chile, Europe, and across the United States. I hope to encourage others to continue to have family meals and to spend time together around the dinner table. This is something I am very passionate about since I did not grow up having meals around the home dinner table. And I am very opinionated about it because currently in my life it is so important.
Some of you may be reading this and not live in the St. Louis area- I hope to post the recipes that I use on the November 4 cooking class here. If you have questions, email me or facebook me. I'm a huge believer in NOT spending all day in the kitchen, but I do believe in healthy, accessible meals with whole food ingredients... no HFCS, no highly processed foods.
Thanks for reading, y'all! It's going to be a good November.
Friday, October 18, 2013
Things I love about Dubois, Wyoming
1. Every time I look out my window, I see snow covered Slate Mountain.
2. Best story time: drop your child off for 5 bucks, and they get lunch.
3. It smells like sage everywhere.
4. People are still close to the earth in that, gardens are close... and we use up everything we have. Groceries are darn expensive here. Except bananas- $0.29 a pound.
5. Sundays are sundays- nobody is open.
6. Anywhere you walk, you feel like you are still in the wilderness.
7. The wind river twists like 8 times in the middle of town.
8.There is a cool playground, and they have bikes for anyone to use.
9. The aspens.
10. The opportunity shop is the best thrift shop in the whole world because of the FREE box.
11. Yoga at Wind River Yoga.
12. It's colder- not humid at all. Wood stove kind of weather. Awesome.
13. Cinnamon Italian Sodas from Kathy's Coffee Shop.
14. The library has free books all the time.
15. People are really friendly here. Genuine.
16. Cowgirls and Cowboys thrive here.
It's a beautiful, fun place. And, it's a small town like where I'm from. It's nice to be thankful for these small wonderful things here in Dubois, Wyoming.
2. Best story time: drop your child off for 5 bucks, and they get lunch.
3. It smells like sage everywhere.
4. People are still close to the earth in that, gardens are close... and we use up everything we have. Groceries are darn expensive here. Except bananas- $0.29 a pound.
5. Sundays are sundays- nobody is open.
6. Anywhere you walk, you feel like you are still in the wilderness.
7. The wind river twists like 8 times in the middle of town.
8.There is a cool playground, and they have bikes for anyone to use.
9. The aspens.
10. The opportunity shop is the best thrift shop in the whole world because of the FREE box.
11. Yoga at Wind River Yoga.
12. It's colder- not humid at all. Wood stove kind of weather. Awesome.
13. Cinnamon Italian Sodas from Kathy's Coffee Shop.
14. The library has free books all the time.
15. People are really friendly here. Genuine.
16. Cowgirls and Cowboys thrive here.
It's a beautiful, fun place. And, it's a small town like where I'm from. It's nice to be thankful for these small wonderful things here in Dubois, Wyoming.
Wednesday, October 16, 2013
Lake Louise
It's been a while since I've written. I feel a little guilty about it, but I think I needed a vacation from the writing of our daily do's. I just did it. There are a couple of things that I do want to remember, so I'll document them today. We've been in Dubois, Wyoming since October 3, and the night that we arrived, there was a huge snowstorm. We got about a foot of snow here. We hiked through town and grocery shopped and enjoyed the fireplace here at our cabin. Ryan and I were already missing Adam. We made the week fun hanging out with friends and meeting new ones. We had some really nice weather after this thunder snow.
So, I figured we should do some hiking (!) and we did. I wanted desperately to try again to Lake Louise that we attempted and failed in late May. I grabbed our accouterments+ and we headed down the Fish Hatchery Road to the Wind River Trailhead. And, Ryan and I spent an afternoon on the trail. We hiked for a good while up and down some hills, rock scrambling, and enjoying the scenery. We listened to the wind blow and the waterfall over tons of rocks. The torrey creek lead us up some steep passes and through some tight canyons. Luckily we didn't see any bears or other wildlife. We had been going for about 2 hours, when we reached this beautiful rock walled area, and Ryan and I were both spent. She's heavy in a back pack on a moderately strenuous hike. Alas, we failed in this attempt to get to the Lake. Again. I felt so beaten. We had a light snack next to the waterfall area, and then we headed down. Along the trail, I took a photograph of this big beautiful mountain protruding out of the ground covered with snow. It was an incredible view, and I couldn't leave without a photo of the view. We continued heading back to the trail head over 2 major hills, and I notice that my favorite hat, and the first gift Adam gave me is missing. I'm not sure where we lost it, but I've got to find it. I walk back a distance to look, and no luck. I put Ryan down and walk as far as I can while I can still keep her in eye distance. Still, to no avail. I decide we're going back until I do. I couldn't part with it- yet. We get back to the point where I shot this said photograph, and there it is. Lying a few feet from that stopping point.
My legs are shaking, and I'm sure that we've been walking for 3 hours. Ryan is doing well, but I'm a little anxious, and I'm tired. I encourage Ryan to encourage me. I have her tell me, "Step by Step, the closer we get to the Volvo." And, she does. It helps tremendously. And, she's so well-behaved. We trudge back after the grueling hike- spent and hungry. I'm sore already, but I feel good we made the attempt albeit failed.
I decided that it was probably good that I didn't see Lake Louise without Adam, but I was unsure if we would attempt it again. Adam and I spoke one evening about going over Google video chat, and he wanted to on the day he came back to Wyoming.
Yesterday, we picked him up in Riverton, and we decided we would still try a small hike- maybe not to Lake Louise, but to the bridge that overlooks the waterfall.We took the drive back down the road to the trail head, and at 4:40pm, we started our hike. Ryan was on Adam's back, and I was hiking in front. We made it to the waterfall overlook on the Glacier Trail, and spent a few minutes there. We talked about our next move. It was a short hike, and we both wanted to go to Lake Louise. So, onward we hiked. And, after what seemed to be a running pace- because we wanted to try to not hike in the dark- WE MADE IT! We climbed the beautiful rock walls that Ryan and I picnicked at on our previous attempt, and not a 1/4 mile later were we at this beautiful vista where the mountains formed a hole where Lake Louise filled with water. The sun had already moved behind the mountains, and we just enjoyed the beautiful hour glass shaped lake. Snow twinkled around it and the sky gleamed purple. The moon rose above the mountain to our left as we stood at the pinnacle of our hike while the lake and mountains were to our right. It was an incredible moment in my life. It's one that I'll never forget- and one that I don't want to forget. We dropped the backpack off at the bottom of this rocky area, and I didn't bring the camera. It's almost fitting how that happens. I just want to remember the view-and I surely will.
Now, Ryan is getting cold. It's dusk, and we're hauling butt back to the car. Shortly after our turnaround, I ask Adam to look at the backpack that I'm holding- We notice that Ryan's coat has fallen off. (This trail wants our items, huh. Not to mention that Ryan's hat fell off at the top, and we had to find it. ) Adam runs for a good 6 minutes to retrieve the coat- and we keep moving. By the time we get back to the waterfall bridge, it's dark. Ryan is miserable by this point, and she has layers of clothes on, but refuses to put on her coat. I'm wet from the camelback spilling down my back. Adam steps in a huge puddle of water and soaks his foot. We are the crazy family that just desperately needed to see Lake Louise that we are hiking in the dark, in the wilderness, with a single child's headlamp. We do have all of our necessities, but I feel like we might have over did it. It took us 3 hours to go up and down. It got dark at 7. We were at the Volvo at 7:40.
You know what though... It was totally worth it. The day we had was unmatched. And our sunset over Lake Louise...majestic. I'm so glad we finally made it- Third times a charm, right??
So, I figured we should do some hiking (!) and we did. I wanted desperately to try again to Lake Louise that we attempted and failed in late May. I grabbed our accouterments+ and we headed down the Fish Hatchery Road to the Wind River Trailhead. And, Ryan and I spent an afternoon on the trail. We hiked for a good while up and down some hills, rock scrambling, and enjoying the scenery. We listened to the wind blow and the waterfall over tons of rocks. The torrey creek lead us up some steep passes and through some tight canyons. Luckily we didn't see any bears or other wildlife. We had been going for about 2 hours, when we reached this beautiful rock walled area, and Ryan and I were both spent. She's heavy in a back pack on a moderately strenuous hike. Alas, we failed in this attempt to get to the Lake. Again. I felt so beaten. We had a light snack next to the waterfall area, and then we headed down. Along the trail, I took a photograph of this big beautiful mountain protruding out of the ground covered with snow. It was an incredible view, and I couldn't leave without a photo of the view. We continued heading back to the trail head over 2 major hills, and I notice that my favorite hat, and the first gift Adam gave me is missing. I'm not sure where we lost it, but I've got to find it. I walk back a distance to look, and no luck. I put Ryan down and walk as far as I can while I can still keep her in eye distance. Still, to no avail. I decide we're going back until I do. I couldn't part with it- yet. We get back to the point where I shot this said photograph, and there it is. Lying a few feet from that stopping point.
My legs are shaking, and I'm sure that we've been walking for 3 hours. Ryan is doing well, but I'm a little anxious, and I'm tired. I encourage Ryan to encourage me. I have her tell me, "Step by Step, the closer we get to the Volvo." And, she does. It helps tremendously. And, she's so well-behaved. We trudge back after the grueling hike- spent and hungry. I'm sore already, but I feel good we made the attempt albeit failed.
I decided that it was probably good that I didn't see Lake Louise without Adam, but I was unsure if we would attempt it again. Adam and I spoke one evening about going over Google video chat, and he wanted to on the day he came back to Wyoming.
Yesterday, we picked him up in Riverton, and we decided we would still try a small hike- maybe not to Lake Louise, but to the bridge that overlooks the waterfall.We took the drive back down the road to the trail head, and at 4:40pm, we started our hike. Ryan was on Adam's back, and I was hiking in front. We made it to the waterfall overlook on the Glacier Trail, and spent a few minutes there. We talked about our next move. It was a short hike, and we both wanted to go to Lake Louise. So, onward we hiked. And, after what seemed to be a running pace- because we wanted to try to not hike in the dark- WE MADE IT! We climbed the beautiful rock walls that Ryan and I picnicked at on our previous attempt, and not a 1/4 mile later were we at this beautiful vista where the mountains formed a hole where Lake Louise filled with water. The sun had already moved behind the mountains, and we just enjoyed the beautiful hour glass shaped lake. Snow twinkled around it and the sky gleamed purple. The moon rose above the mountain to our left as we stood at the pinnacle of our hike while the lake and mountains were to our right. It was an incredible moment in my life. It's one that I'll never forget- and one that I don't want to forget. We dropped the backpack off at the bottom of this rocky area, and I didn't bring the camera. It's almost fitting how that happens. I just want to remember the view-and I surely will.
Now, Ryan is getting cold. It's dusk, and we're hauling butt back to the car. Shortly after our turnaround, I ask Adam to look at the backpack that I'm holding- We notice that Ryan's coat has fallen off. (This trail wants our items, huh. Not to mention that Ryan's hat fell off at the top, and we had to find it. ) Adam runs for a good 6 minutes to retrieve the coat- and we keep moving. By the time we get back to the waterfall bridge, it's dark. Ryan is miserable by this point, and she has layers of clothes on, but refuses to put on her coat. I'm wet from the camelback spilling down my back. Adam steps in a huge puddle of water and soaks his foot. We are the crazy family that just desperately needed to see Lake Louise that we are hiking in the dark, in the wilderness, with a single child's headlamp. We do have all of our necessities, but I feel like we might have over did it. It took us 3 hours to go up and down. It got dark at 7. We were at the Volvo at 7:40.
You know what though... It was totally worth it. The day we had was unmatched. And our sunset over Lake Louise...majestic. I'm so glad we finally made it- Third times a charm, right??
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Elephant Back
It was one of those mornings I couldn't pass up. Snow on the ground, the husband off of work, and a babysitter. It was a morning for a hike. No more than a quarter mile from the dorms is Elephant Back Trail that overlooks Yellowstone Lake.
We were the first people on the trail. We were definitely worried about grizzlies since there is one particularly big one that is hanging out around Lake Hotel. We fortunately came prepared with bear spray, hiked in a group, and when we were winded (I'm still adjusting to the altitude) we made plenty of noise. The snow almost felt magical, especially since it's only September. The hike climbed 800 feet, and once we made it up to the top, the snow was deeper. The trees were covered with a blanket of snow, and it is a hike I'll likely never forget.
The best part of the whole hike (3.6 miles total) was the point in which we first saw the view. On a switchback the trees open up and the silvery sky, lake, and trees appear. The white is snow, the sun glistens when it hits the slivery landscape like a shiny nickel. As we climb higher, the trail flattens and trees surround us. The sky is blue through the canopy. It's beautiful... but it's not winter. Or so I thought.
It was a good morning. A wonderful hike in the snow. I only wish we would have some sunshine. I miss the sun. I haven't seen it in a couple of days.
The next day we took a drive to Gardiner, Montana. We drove to the nearest grocery store, and for being really rural it was a nice store. We planned for the next weeks dinners and we turned around through Teddy Roosevelt's Arch and headed back to the lake. We stopped at Norris Geyser Basin and took a short hike through the geysers and springs. It's amazing how beautiful hot water and thermal areas can be. Beautiful blue crystal bubbling water is incredibly smelly though as well. The earth is obviously a living, breathing thing, and when in Yellowstone- it's a clear fact.
Not all about this traveling scenario is ideal. I'm easily entertained, but this weather is not ideal. I need some sunshine... Will you all in the South send me some please??
We were the first people on the trail. We were definitely worried about grizzlies since there is one particularly big one that is hanging out around Lake Hotel. We fortunately came prepared with bear spray, hiked in a group, and when we were winded (I'm still adjusting to the altitude) we made plenty of noise. The snow almost felt magical, especially since it's only September. The hike climbed 800 feet, and once we made it up to the top, the snow was deeper. The trees were covered with a blanket of snow, and it is a hike I'll likely never forget.
The best part of the whole hike (3.6 miles total) was the point in which we first saw the view. On a switchback the trees open up and the silvery sky, lake, and trees appear. The white is snow, the sun glistens when it hits the slivery landscape like a shiny nickel. As we climb higher, the trail flattens and trees surround us. The sky is blue through the canopy. It's beautiful... but it's not winter. Or so I thought.
It was a good morning. A wonderful hike in the snow. I only wish we would have some sunshine. I miss the sun. I haven't seen it in a couple of days.
The next day we took a drive to Gardiner, Montana. We drove to the nearest grocery store, and for being really rural it was a nice store. We planned for the next weeks dinners and we turned around through Teddy Roosevelt's Arch and headed back to the lake. We stopped at Norris Geyser Basin and took a short hike through the geysers and springs. It's amazing how beautiful hot water and thermal areas can be. Beautiful blue crystal bubbling water is incredibly smelly though as well. The earth is obviously a living, breathing thing, and when in Yellowstone- it's a clear fact.
Not all about this traveling scenario is ideal. I'm easily entertained, but this weather is not ideal. I need some sunshine... Will you all in the South send me some please??
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
This is crazy
This life is an amazing adventure. My life is so different than it was just a few months ago. We're on the move. We're a traveling family when I was so stable and went to a job everyday of the work week. What I remember seems so distant, and still yet I have my own schedule and I still get a lot of "work" accomplished.
When we left this last time, it was definitely bittersweet. I do miss my home, but the exchange for this landscape is worth it. We had quite the adventure, and I'll start with our attempt (yes, attempt) to leave St. Louis. Our goal was to just drive a couple of hours, so that we could camp. And, we left, ate dinner, and filled up our sweet old Volvo with gas. Then, the old girl (the Volvo) wouldn't start. We have known there's been a bit of an issue, but we weren't worried. When she didn't start for 30 minutes, we decided once she did we would go home. Our efforts foiled, we were a bit discouraged, but the Volvo started the next morning, and we headed west. Yes, despite the fact that we could be in the same predicament again. The whole day, we never turned off our car. And we made it to a campspot called Sheridan in western Kansas.
This lake was in a valley, filled with rocks and trees. To our east, the ridge was higher than our line of sight, so when the night fell upon us, the harvest moon- brilliant orange and beautiful, rose from behind it. Our night included making dinner and Adam and I having some adult time while the moon glistened on the water. It was one of those things that just doesn't always happen. It felt like a good omen, and we were going to make it west.
We had a lovely morning. I've learned something about myself when I camp. I'm a morning person. I don't try to stay up late at a campsite... I'm usually tired and I often like to watch the sunrise. Considering this, we were right on the line for the time change, where, it wasn't until 7:20 that the sun finally rose. It rose beautifully just as the moon had done so the night before.
I had time to gather wood, start a fire (which I'm proud to say that I used the coals that were still hot from the night before), make coffee and breakfast. These tasks were done all while my daughter and husband slept in. It's a lovely thing to enjoy these small joys. I haven't always been able to "camp", but it's just like cooking a meal. It's all a process, and it becomes second nature after you do it a couple of times.
We had a quite a few tasks to complete while in Denver. Adam had a job... which took the entire evening, and we had to pick up the part for our Volvo. We also so our sweet sister who just started college in Lakewood, CO. It was a long day in the car, and we also didn't turn the car off unless absolutely necessary. That evening we made it to Dubois, Wyoming. It was a full day to say the least.
Monday we grocery shopped and left for Yellowstone. It's been pretty nice. We're in a dorm room, and we already settled in well. We have food and a menu- so that's my job. I'm the cook. Yesterday we had chili (wonderfully comforting since it is chilly out.) And, tonight we're having Saucy chicken thighs with prunes and raisins.
Yesterday (Tuesday) we saw a GRIZZLY bear. Oh. My. Word. Those creatures are fierce. huge. scary. We were on our way to the hike, and right outside the dorms-- the grizzly stood scratching and looking for food. We headed to the ranger-led hike, and we were late... so I'm nervous and hiking mad-fast just to try to catch up to the group. I finally did, but we met up with some Europeans and they weren't all about listening to the ranger. It took us an hour (that's it) to hike 2.5 miles... and I had Ryan on my back the entire time. I didn't even take a break. It felt good. The weather was beautiful, and we could see the Tetons from Storm Point, which I didn't get to see the last time.
What to hear one other thing? We're still (UGH!) trying to potty train Ryan. And, it's almost there. Still... she peed in her pants 2 times yesterday. Any advice?
Hope you all are well! I'm loving the snow-- it's coming down right now!!
When we left this last time, it was definitely bittersweet. I do miss my home, but the exchange for this landscape is worth it. We had quite the adventure, and I'll start with our attempt (yes, attempt) to leave St. Louis. Our goal was to just drive a couple of hours, so that we could camp. And, we left, ate dinner, and filled up our sweet old Volvo with gas. Then, the old girl (the Volvo) wouldn't start. We have known there's been a bit of an issue, but we weren't worried. When she didn't start for 30 minutes, we decided once she did we would go home. Our efforts foiled, we were a bit discouraged, but the Volvo started the next morning, and we headed west. Yes, despite the fact that we could be in the same predicament again. The whole day, we never turned off our car. And we made it to a campspot called Sheridan in western Kansas.
This lake was in a valley, filled with rocks and trees. To our east, the ridge was higher than our line of sight, so when the night fell upon us, the harvest moon- brilliant orange and beautiful, rose from behind it. Our night included making dinner and Adam and I having some adult time while the moon glistened on the water. It was one of those things that just doesn't always happen. It felt like a good omen, and we were going to make it west.
We had a lovely morning. I've learned something about myself when I camp. I'm a morning person. I don't try to stay up late at a campsite... I'm usually tired and I often like to watch the sunrise. Considering this, we were right on the line for the time change, where, it wasn't until 7:20 that the sun finally rose. It rose beautifully just as the moon had done so the night before.
I had time to gather wood, start a fire (which I'm proud to say that I used the coals that were still hot from the night before), make coffee and breakfast. These tasks were done all while my daughter and husband slept in. It's a lovely thing to enjoy these small joys. I haven't always been able to "camp", but it's just like cooking a meal. It's all a process, and it becomes second nature after you do it a couple of times.
We had a quite a few tasks to complete while in Denver. Adam had a job... which took the entire evening, and we had to pick up the part for our Volvo. We also so our sweet sister who just started college in Lakewood, CO. It was a long day in the car, and we also didn't turn the car off unless absolutely necessary. That evening we made it to Dubois, Wyoming. It was a full day to say the least.
Monday we grocery shopped and left for Yellowstone. It's been pretty nice. We're in a dorm room, and we already settled in well. We have food and a menu- so that's my job. I'm the cook. Yesterday we had chili (wonderfully comforting since it is chilly out.) And, tonight we're having Saucy chicken thighs with prunes and raisins.
Yesterday (Tuesday) we saw a GRIZZLY bear. Oh. My. Word. Those creatures are fierce. huge. scary. We were on our way to the hike, and right outside the dorms-- the grizzly stood scratching and looking for food. We headed to the ranger-led hike, and we were late... so I'm nervous and hiking mad-fast just to try to catch up to the group. I finally did, but we met up with some Europeans and they weren't all about listening to the ranger. It took us an hour (that's it) to hike 2.5 miles... and I had Ryan on my back the entire time. I didn't even take a break. It felt good. The weather was beautiful, and we could see the Tetons from Storm Point, which I didn't get to see the last time.
What to hear one other thing? We're still (UGH!) trying to potty train Ryan. And, it's almost there. Still... she peed in her pants 2 times yesterday. Any advice?
Hope you all are well! I'm loving the snow-- it's coming down right now!!
Friday, September 13, 2013
It's one of those days
I got up today and all is well. But, you know what, I thought I was pregnant. Sadly, it was a reminder of my loss.
I think it's always a process, and I know that I would have been pregnant, and I should be trying to get pregnant again. I just felt such a blow. I am doing fine. I just have a bad day every now and again. It makes me remember how precious life is.
It might be silly to contemplate too long on this, so I'm finished. Just saying I'm remembering the life, but I'm not remembering it silently.
I think it's always a process, and I know that I would have been pregnant, and I should be trying to get pregnant again. I just felt such a blow. I am doing fine. I just have a bad day every now and again. It makes me remember how precious life is.
It might be silly to contemplate too long on this, so I'm finished. Just saying I'm remembering the life, but I'm not remembering it silently.
Let's Get Honest
I've been seeing a lot of overlap in my personal life... big "ah-ha" moments. Things that I'm reading all around have been paralleling each other. I've noticed some differences happening in my life and I know that God is working in my life.
I'm doing bible study with my sisters, Adam's sisters. And, it's Beth Moore's A Woman's Heart. It's really incredible, and she is an incredible speaker. The reason I mention this is because I have noticed that we as humans are problematic. We all have problems-- I have problems... it's just the way it is.
I notice that a lot of my facebook feed is filled with articles and posts on the problems we have as women and the things that we analyze and over analyze. I myself am guilty of that. I find myself happy with other people and their lives while I find myself comparing mine to them. And, it isn't healthy. I spent quite a lot of time away from facebook for the first two years of my daugther's life. I was not in the right place to be looking at other's photos etc. I have a problem in that I start comparing myself/my life to others instead of embracing the beautiful life that I have. I admit this here. I confess it here. And, it's probably something other people can identify with. I gave the good ol' facebook up on purpose, and it was good and refreshing.
This realization came to me after reading an article directed toward women and how our nature makes us do that... or our society makes us compare in this way. We do it constantly. We, as women, watch other people and the way they walk and dress and act. And, facebook is just one other way for us to perpetuate that. I thankfully have found a way to be in control and make good ol' facebook a positive outlet.
I am on facebook regularly. I think I've finally figured out how I can use my facebook visit positively. I keep what I need to do on my mind and I have a purpose in what I post...The reason I use it now is for the right reason. I'm writing (like I am right now). I'm identifying with others and trying to contemplate our problems. I'm attempting to start a cottage industry on etsy with my little shop... that I pray to God succeeds. It isn't easy- it's hard work.
My life is changing all the time. I simply am writing this to you today to encourage you. I hope that with whatever you are struggling, that you find peace about it. I pray that you have realization and open your eyes to the beautiful wonderful things we are given by God. I realize that I'm not perfect and that I have problems too, but I want to be better!
I'm doing bible study with my sisters, Adam's sisters. And, it's Beth Moore's A Woman's Heart. It's really incredible, and she is an incredible speaker. The reason I mention this is because I have noticed that we as humans are problematic. We all have problems-- I have problems... it's just the way it is.
I notice that a lot of my facebook feed is filled with articles and posts on the problems we have as women and the things that we analyze and over analyze. I myself am guilty of that. I find myself happy with other people and their lives while I find myself comparing mine to them. And, it isn't healthy. I spent quite a lot of time away from facebook for the first two years of my daugther's life. I was not in the right place to be looking at other's photos etc. I have a problem in that I start comparing myself/my life to others instead of embracing the beautiful life that I have. I admit this here. I confess it here. And, it's probably something other people can identify with. I gave the good ol' facebook up on purpose, and it was good and refreshing.
This realization came to me after reading an article directed toward women and how our nature makes us do that... or our society makes us compare in this way. We do it constantly. We, as women, watch other people and the way they walk and dress and act. And, facebook is just one other way for us to perpetuate that. I thankfully have found a way to be in control and make good ol' facebook a positive outlet.
I am on facebook regularly. I think I've finally figured out how I can use my facebook visit positively. I keep what I need to do on my mind and I have a purpose in what I post...The reason I use it now is for the right reason. I'm writing (like I am right now). I'm identifying with others and trying to contemplate our problems. I'm attempting to start a cottage industry on etsy with my little shop... that I pray to God succeeds. It isn't easy- it's hard work.
My life is changing all the time. I simply am writing this to you today to encourage you. I hope that with whatever you are struggling, that you find peace about it. I pray that you have realization and open your eyes to the beautiful wonderful things we are given by God. I realize that I'm not perfect and that I have problems too, but I want to be better!
Thursday, September 12, 2013
A sweet memory
I write a lot. I use my journal. I type things here. I spend a lot of time in my head, and most of the time that's good. I have an awesome memory. I hardly ever forget the good moments, and I try really hard to forget the ones that were less than desirable.
Saying that, I was driving somewhere recently, and a memory of my husband and his friends when I first met popped in my head. I know a country song was playing, and the words went something like, "I wanna write you a song." I thought about that in my life, and this memory came upon me. It surrounded me and over took me. I simply had forgotten this moment when Adam WROTE and SANG me a song. God love my husband, he's got a different kind of voice. But, it was so romantic.
I'll tell you the who's, what, where, and when.
It was the first summer we met. We'd been hanging out for a few weeks. We had probably just became boyfriend and girlfriend. I didn't cook at that time much because I was the guest at the house where he resided at the time. He lived with two buddies, Noah and Mush. So, a typical evening at the tan house (lava mountain lodge) included dinner, cleaning up, and Adam making cookies. I usually picked up dish duty, as I should, for the boys making food. This particular night was a little different.
Music was often playing around. There were guitars and one of those bongo drums around the house. A harmonica wasn't hard to come across... It wasn't unusual for someone to be playing some type of musical instrument at any moment.
I was cleaning and one by one the boys started playing these said instruments, and soon after, Adam serenaded me with a song in his own flavor. A song that I couldn't ever forget... but, did.
I should write out the lyrics and try to attempt the rhythm, but how do you portray this image in my mind? They had set this stage. This one moment in time, one night in Wyoming. And, Adam sang.
Well, my baby called me up
She said, I'm comin' down tonight.
I said, well, come over baby,
I'm gonna make it right tonight.
Cause she's my baby,
She's my honey.
She's my girl.
And, there were more lyrics, and Adam definitely has them written somewhere.
I was blushing. I felt so special. I'd never been treated with such a fantastic gesture. It wasn't one of those things that happen any more to a girl. It's like one of those scenes in a movie that we all secretly wish still did. It was so unplanned, but it was perfect.
Does that make you smile? A little romantic gesture. Let me tell you. That is something that I love about my sweet husband. I sure am thankful for God blessing me with a husband that loves me. And, I'm so thankful for the time that we had to get to know one another.
I decided that I should write about this. In case someone is a hopeless romantic and smiles about sweet nothings like this.
Saying that, I was driving somewhere recently, and a memory of my husband and his friends when I first met popped in my head. I know a country song was playing, and the words went something like, "I wanna write you a song." I thought about that in my life, and this memory came upon me. It surrounded me and over took me. I simply had forgotten this moment when Adam WROTE and SANG me a song. God love my husband, he's got a different kind of voice. But, it was so romantic.
I'll tell you the who's, what, where, and when.
It was the first summer we met. We'd been hanging out for a few weeks. We had probably just became boyfriend and girlfriend. I didn't cook at that time much because I was the guest at the house where he resided at the time. He lived with two buddies, Noah and Mush. So, a typical evening at the tan house (lava mountain lodge) included dinner, cleaning up, and Adam making cookies. I usually picked up dish duty, as I should, for the boys making food. This particular night was a little different.
Music was often playing around. There were guitars and one of those bongo drums around the house. A harmonica wasn't hard to come across... It wasn't unusual for someone to be playing some type of musical instrument at any moment.
I was cleaning and one by one the boys started playing these said instruments, and soon after, Adam serenaded me with a song in his own flavor. A song that I couldn't ever forget... but, did.
I should write out the lyrics and try to attempt the rhythm, but how do you portray this image in my mind? They had set this stage. This one moment in time, one night in Wyoming. And, Adam sang.
Well, my baby called me up
She said, I'm comin' down tonight.
I said, well, come over baby,
I'm gonna make it right tonight.
Cause she's my baby,
She's my honey.
She's my girl.
And, there were more lyrics, and Adam definitely has them written somewhere.
I was blushing. I felt so special. I'd never been treated with such a fantastic gesture. It wasn't one of those things that happen any more to a girl. It's like one of those scenes in a movie that we all secretly wish still did. It was so unplanned, but it was perfect.
Does that make you smile? A little romantic gesture. Let me tell you. That is something that I love about my sweet husband. I sure am thankful for God blessing me with a husband that loves me. And, I'm so thankful for the time that we had to get to know one another.
I decided that I should write about this. In case someone is a hopeless romantic and smiles about sweet nothings like this.
Future Plans
Life is crazy busy while at home. We have lots to get prepared before out next stent out west. We'll be gone for several weeks again. Wyoming is our destination (again!) and I am stoked. Hey, maybe I'll even find Lake Louise this time around!
We're leaving a few weeks from now, and although I love traveling, it's been really wonderful to be at home and to be with Ryan. I still don't have a schedule- we have days that are kinda the same where as we do a lot in the mornings- come home for nap time- and prepare meals at home. It's been wonderful this week in particular.
My dad and an old friend of his stopped through while on the way to Columbia, Missouri. I made some new things- out of my regular scope of recipes. It was really hot the day that they made it into town, so I made a cucumber juice. Now, this is a treat. I adapted it from Sunny Anderson's Mean Green Cucumber Juice recipe on the food network. If you look it up- definitely use less sugar. It's really sweet and delicious. I would try it first just as the recipe calls! It's wonderfully fresh and delicious especially on a hot, sticky day.
The other things that I made for our meal were firsts too. I made an almond encrusted tilapia- from a repertoire of other fish that I have created. And, Brocolli and cheese quinoa. It was a delightful meal- wonderfully summer.
Almond Crusted Tilapia:
1/2 cup whole wheat flour
1/2 cup almond slivers, pounded into a coarse grain (I did this in a ziplock bag with a dough roller)
1/4 cup corn meal
1/2 cup panko
1 tbsp. paprika
1 tbsp. cumin
1-2 eggs
fresh lemon slices
salt and pepper
as many tilapia filets as you think you can eat! I made 7 large filets
Heat Olive Oil in a iron skillet to medium high to high. Once oil is hot, place dipped fish in hot oil. Pan fry for about 3-4 minutes each side until golden brown. I set up a cookie sheet covered with cornmeal once they were finished frying, and placed them in a warm oven at 350 degrees so that I could complete the other filets. As to not crowd the pan, I did two filets at a time. Once the oil is good and hot, some of it may be soaked up in the fish, so I did have to add more from time to time.
Tilapia is not a flavorful fish, so this is a well seasoned recipe. The lemon really brings out the flavors of the fish and the almond crust! I used lemon liberally! Another suggestion to add or have at the table is a lemon garlic aioli sauce.... a simple mayonnaise with lemon and garlic... YUM!
The broccoli cheese quinoa is easy and indulgent. I used steamed broccoli, Colby jack cheese, 2 cups cooked quinoa. My one trick here is stone ground mustard added in to the mixture. I added one tbsp. of that zesty stuff and it was delicious. Use the amount of broccoli and Colby jack cheese to your taste....
Brocolli Cheese Quinoa
2 cups cooked quinoa
1 bunch steamed broccoli
1/2 block of Colby jack cheese, shredded
1tbsp stone ground mustard
1tbsp olive oil
salt and pepper
Mix together cheese when quinoa is hot to make sure it melts!
I hope you enjoy these recipes. I did. It was a wonderfully satisfying meal and perfect for a summer night.
I've been a busy bee. I opened my etsy shop! I have a few other items to post for sale, and I've been running to get prepared for our next stint in Wyoming! I gotta be in tip top shape to hike with Ryan on my back! I know it's getting close to winter there, so I've got a lot of packing to do with warm clothes.
Still, I'm excited!
One last piece of information. The disposable camera I had from Leidy Lake was damaged at Walgreen's. So, I have no pictures from that lovely day at the first of the summer. At least I wrote it down! A verbal image is almost as good, right?
I'd love to hear from you! Comments and suggestions on anything you'd like to see on the etsy store, or things I should create on my trip, paintings, etc. This is my 89th post, so I'm thrilled! That's pretty good, right?
Happy Thursday!
We're leaving a few weeks from now, and although I love traveling, it's been really wonderful to be at home and to be with Ryan. I still don't have a schedule- we have days that are kinda the same where as we do a lot in the mornings- come home for nap time- and prepare meals at home. It's been wonderful this week in particular.
My dad and an old friend of his stopped through while on the way to Columbia, Missouri. I made some new things- out of my regular scope of recipes. It was really hot the day that they made it into town, so I made a cucumber juice. Now, this is a treat. I adapted it from Sunny Anderson's Mean Green Cucumber Juice recipe on the food network. If you look it up- definitely use less sugar. It's really sweet and delicious. I would try it first just as the recipe calls! It's wonderfully fresh and delicious especially on a hot, sticky day.
The other things that I made for our meal were firsts too. I made an almond encrusted tilapia- from a repertoire of other fish that I have created. And, Brocolli and cheese quinoa. It was a delightful meal- wonderfully summer.
Almond Crusted Tilapia:
1/2 cup whole wheat flour
1/2 cup almond slivers, pounded into a coarse grain (I did this in a ziplock bag with a dough roller)
1/4 cup corn meal
1/2 cup panko
1 tbsp. paprika
1 tbsp. cumin
1-2 eggs
fresh lemon slices
salt and pepper
as many tilapia filets as you think you can eat! I made 7 large filets
Heat Olive Oil in a iron skillet to medium high to high. Once oil is hot, place dipped fish in hot oil. Pan fry for about 3-4 minutes each side until golden brown. I set up a cookie sheet covered with cornmeal once they were finished frying, and placed them in a warm oven at 350 degrees so that I could complete the other filets. As to not crowd the pan, I did two filets at a time. Once the oil is good and hot, some of it may be soaked up in the fish, so I did have to add more from time to time.
Tilapia is not a flavorful fish, so this is a well seasoned recipe. The lemon really brings out the flavors of the fish and the almond crust! I used lemon liberally! Another suggestion to add or have at the table is a lemon garlic aioli sauce.... a simple mayonnaise with lemon and garlic... YUM!
The broccoli cheese quinoa is easy and indulgent. I used steamed broccoli, Colby jack cheese, 2 cups cooked quinoa. My one trick here is stone ground mustard added in to the mixture. I added one tbsp. of that zesty stuff and it was delicious. Use the amount of broccoli and Colby jack cheese to your taste....
Brocolli Cheese Quinoa
2 cups cooked quinoa
1 bunch steamed broccoli
1/2 block of Colby jack cheese, shredded
1tbsp stone ground mustard
1tbsp olive oil
salt and pepper
Mix together cheese when quinoa is hot to make sure it melts!
I hope you enjoy these recipes. I did. It was a wonderfully satisfying meal and perfect for a summer night.
I've been a busy bee. I opened my etsy shop! I have a few other items to post for sale, and I've been running to get prepared for our next stint in Wyoming! I gotta be in tip top shape to hike with Ryan on my back! I know it's getting close to winter there, so I've got a lot of packing to do with warm clothes.
Still, I'm excited!
One last piece of information. The disposable camera I had from Leidy Lake was damaged at Walgreen's. So, I have no pictures from that lovely day at the first of the summer. At least I wrote it down! A verbal image is almost as good, right?
I'd love to hear from you! Comments and suggestions on anything you'd like to see on the etsy store, or things I should create on my trip, paintings, etc. This is my 89th post, so I'm thrilled! That's pretty good, right?
Happy Thursday!
Saturday, September 7, 2013
Things don't go my way
Things can get difficult sometimes, huh? What is the best way to fuel this issue we have as humans? Our mouths. I am quite concerned about what I say or don't say most of the time. I'm very happy when I don't have to speak. And, I'm often overly conscious about what I should or shouldn't say. Why are our mouths in so much control instead of our brains. Why do we fly off? Why must we constantly keep our mouths in check?
Probably because what we say can be so hurtful and so foul. It's a devils workshop if you ask me. I am pretty sensitive. I work hard at using encouraging words and I also have a "sponge" for a daughter. She hears everything. And, we have to always be conscientious about that.
Ultimately, I don't always effectively control my mouth or my words, and sometimes, I hurt others. It's a flaw, but know that I am constantly trying to correct this muscle of mine that seems to be out of control periodically.
A harsh word stirs up anger... Anybody ever heard of that? Man. It's a killer.
****
The zoo was nice today though, and Ryan and I saw the new Sea Lion Sound! It's incredible. The tunnel walk goes under water allow you to see the sea lions swimming above! The tunnel is so cool! I loved it probably more than Ryan did.
****
I've had my creative juices flowing a bit lately, and I'm looking for 2 long term projects to do that require few tools. I made that painting last week, but I'm in the need for a muse for my next painting project. I'm a watercolor fanatic. I'd like to try some flowers or animals again. Any suggestions?
Also, I'm interested in Finger weaving/Finger crocheting. I'd love to make a huge blanket out of extra large yarn. Does anyone have suggestions on where to start? I'm going to youtube it later.
I would also like a pair of leg warmers, extra long/thigh high so to scrunch down for camping. I'm not don't knit or crochet, so I'm always looking for assistance.
My palate is bored right now with food. And, that is so terribly unusual for me. I'm under a spell... I guess from that stomach bug- things just aren't back to normal.
****
We went to Art Outside last night and heard some amazing bluegrass homegrown right here near St. Louis in Belleville, Il. Check out the song, Where I stand by Old Salt Union. Youtube it, right now, You'll love it!
Probably because what we say can be so hurtful and so foul. It's a devils workshop if you ask me. I am pretty sensitive. I work hard at using encouraging words and I also have a "sponge" for a daughter. She hears everything. And, we have to always be conscientious about that.
Ultimately, I don't always effectively control my mouth or my words, and sometimes, I hurt others. It's a flaw, but know that I am constantly trying to correct this muscle of mine that seems to be out of control periodically.
A harsh word stirs up anger... Anybody ever heard of that? Man. It's a killer.
****
The zoo was nice today though, and Ryan and I saw the new Sea Lion Sound! It's incredible. The tunnel walk goes under water allow you to see the sea lions swimming above! The tunnel is so cool! I loved it probably more than Ryan did.
****
I've had my creative juices flowing a bit lately, and I'm looking for 2 long term projects to do that require few tools. I made that painting last week, but I'm in the need for a muse for my next painting project. I'm a watercolor fanatic. I'd like to try some flowers or animals again. Any suggestions?
Also, I'm interested in Finger weaving/Finger crocheting. I'd love to make a huge blanket out of extra large yarn. Does anyone have suggestions on where to start? I'm going to youtube it later.
I would also like a pair of leg warmers, extra long/thigh high so to scrunch down for camping. I'm not don't knit or crochet, so I'm always looking for assistance.
My palate is bored right now with food. And, that is so terribly unusual for me. I'm under a spell... I guess from that stomach bug- things just aren't back to normal.
****
We went to Art Outside last night and heard some amazing bluegrass homegrown right here near St. Louis in Belleville, Il. Check out the song, Where I stand by Old Salt Union. Youtube it, right now, You'll love it!
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Family
I can't tell you how wonderful it is to be surrounded by family that loves you. It's refreshing. It's special.
My family is small, but they are dear to me, and last week we saw both of my parents, Adam's siblings and parents, and my sister, and distant Sterling relatives. It always amazes me that family can be so welcoming and we can find shelter in them.
Our visit with our loved ones are always cherished, and we sure squeezed them all in! It was fun too.
What wasn't fun was puking all the way home. Ryan and I got a stomach bug, and we both hurled a couple of times on the drive home. I'm finally feeling better, but there's nothing like a quick gastritis to knock you down. My stomach still isn't quite right, but I'm coming around slowly.
As to other news, I'm healthy. I did go to the doctor for my annual checkup, and all of my womanly tests came back negative which is fantastic. That is an answer to my prayers.
Today's post is short and sweet! We have lots of work here in St. Louis, and I am prepping for my etsy shop to open within 2 weeks. I have some cool stuff to sell! When it's up an running, I'll let you know!! For those who love beautiful vintage things, my shop is for you! I'll share the name with you soon!
My family is small, but they are dear to me, and last week we saw both of my parents, Adam's siblings and parents, and my sister, and distant Sterling relatives. It always amazes me that family can be so welcoming and we can find shelter in them.
Our visit with our loved ones are always cherished, and we sure squeezed them all in! It was fun too.
What wasn't fun was puking all the way home. Ryan and I got a stomach bug, and we both hurled a couple of times on the drive home. I'm finally feeling better, but there's nothing like a quick gastritis to knock you down. My stomach still isn't quite right, but I'm coming around slowly.
As to other news, I'm healthy. I did go to the doctor for my annual checkup, and all of my womanly tests came back negative which is fantastic. That is an answer to my prayers.
Today's post is short and sweet! We have lots of work here in St. Louis, and I am prepping for my etsy shop to open within 2 weeks. I have some cool stuff to sell! When it's up an running, I'll let you know!! For those who love beautiful vintage things, my shop is for you! I'll share the name with you soon!
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Swimming and Labor Day!
One big thing has been missing from my life this summer. Swimming! Sadly, I wasn't able to do so- then the weather wasn't really cooperative in that it was chilly. In South Dakota, it wasn't summer at all yet. The same for Yellowstone and North Dakota. In Texas I got to swim once.
Last Summer we had a pool membership, and we were there daily! I love the pool most of the time, and it's a nice way to cool off.
I'm being reminded of this fact today. It's warm outside. We've already been on our errands and to the park, so that we wouldn't have to melt our faces later today. The other thing is that since we're going to be in Tennessee and Arkansas for the next few days, I'm thrilled I'll be able to swim! Hallelujah!
We're going to Tennessee for a quick hello to my sister (who I can't wait to see), my mom, and my dad. It's only been since June, but I'm so happy that I get to see them again. We may not be able to do this again until Christmas or Thanksgiving, so I'm going to soak it up.
Then, the big weekend in Searcy, Arkansas with my husband's side of the family will include more fun,water (swimming), and boats. I'm really excited. I don't waterski- (What?) sadly, so I'll be soaking up the sun and hanging out.
I hope that Ryan has a blast with everyone. I'm even probably going to attend my high school's football game this friday. Holy cow. 10 years since I've been there. I can't wait to see my sister play her drums. I've never seen her! She's in the tenth grade, and she's darling. I'm so stoked to hang out for a hot minute with her!
Happy Labor Day all!
Last Summer we had a pool membership, and we were there daily! I love the pool most of the time, and it's a nice way to cool off.
I'm being reminded of this fact today. It's warm outside. We've already been on our errands and to the park, so that we wouldn't have to melt our faces later today. The other thing is that since we're going to be in Tennessee and Arkansas for the next few days, I'm thrilled I'll be able to swim! Hallelujah!
We're going to Tennessee for a quick hello to my sister (who I can't wait to see), my mom, and my dad. It's only been since June, but I'm so happy that I get to see them again. We may not be able to do this again until Christmas or Thanksgiving, so I'm going to soak it up.
Then, the big weekend in Searcy, Arkansas with my husband's side of the family will include more fun,water (swimming), and boats. I'm really excited. I don't waterski- (What?) sadly, so I'll be soaking up the sun and hanging out.
I hope that Ryan has a blast with everyone. I'm even probably going to attend my high school's football game this friday. Holy cow. 10 years since I've been there. I can't wait to see my sister play her drums. I've never seen her! She's in the tenth grade, and she's darling. I'm so stoked to hang out for a hot minute with her!
Happy Labor Day all!
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Hot Weather, Hard Work
Well, Summer's here, huh? We had such a mild summer, and it was needed. I can handle this... or so I thought.
We're planning the next couple of moves, and we've been home and plan on staying home until the end of September. With the exception of visiting some family in the South for Labor Day.
It's been a good couple of weeks at home, which I spoke about in my last post. The last week, though, I have been working under the direction of my husband at a real professional job. I'm the painter. Let me tell you- I'm putting a lot of effort in to it, but I'm not a professional. I do my best work, yet I'm so slow. I worked outside, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and yesterday. I've been painting french doors. They are my favorite type of door, but not to paint! So, again, My husband and I were working on a project together, and I was there for work support (well, some), and moral support, too. I'm obviously not a paid employee, but I keep painting and helping while taking breaks. The heat just saps my energy. That, and I'm climbing up and down a ladder all day... drinking water during breaks. I've been reminded that I'm not exactly a laborer by trade. I'm active, but every morning last week, I woke up sore. The kind of soreness that fades once you get moving, but definitely sore. It's crazy how the body will adapt and get ready for it. Also, I have to psych myself into it too. I get up and get ready, so I don't lolligag around and talk myself out of it.
Ultimately, it's just another reminder of how thankful I am for a husband who has just an outstanding work ethic. He's not afraid of hard work or a hot day- or a crap ton of work. He just does it. Wow. I'm impressed. It reminded me that I should really be more appreciative of him and his gifts. Adam is a provider- and of course, his gifts come from God. There's just no other way to explain it. And, I'm thankful for it!
A few other fun things have been happening too. Ryan successfully made it through Church on Sunday, and she had fun. We'd been battling that after we returned home, she was a bit uncomfortable and she cried so much they had to call us on the monitor during the sermon. Another thing that we've been challenged by is bedtime... Ryan's bedtime, that is. Ryan has been having a breakdown before bed, and she screams and cries. It hasn't been pleasant since we got home. We tried leaving a light on. We tried doing the same thing as we did before we left. She's feeling separation anxiety. It can get pretty ugly though. And, it has upset me. Adam and I got on the same page, and we made a plan. Ryan is more likely to go to bed with Adam. With me, she just wants to cuddle. And, I have a lot of trouble with that at her bedtime. I get impatient. We turned the light off, now, and Adam puts her to sleep. And, it's working!! After all, we just keep persevering.
Since I haven't written much in a while, here's a list of a few other happenings in the last few weeks:
1. I hammer-drilled out the old morter in the exposed brick of our bathroom- single-handedly.
2. We had a cookout on Sunday- and I made quite the spread. Southern Hospitality at it's finest.
3. I made another peach pie and banana bread.
4. We've watched Monster's Inc. ALOT since it's Ryan's favorite movie now.
5. I started Beth Moore's A Woman's Heart Bible Study, and I'm being seriously enlightened by God.
6. I'm trying to plan out some final hikes for when we're in Wyoming in Sept or October.
7. I've made more of an effort to walk/bike instead of drive to the closest places of interest, like the library, Kmart, closest restaurants.
8. Ryan and I have been talking about "stories" (she'll make up her own), and her language continues to amaze me.
9. Life is so precious. I'm so thankful for my life.
And Lastly, My husband cut his hair!!!! After 5 years of dreadlocks... and, man, I love it! I got to cut it and wash it, and brush it out. It is so different! It's the shortest I've ever seen it, but I managed to keep it pretty long! I like looking at him lately!!
We're planning the next couple of moves, and we've been home and plan on staying home until the end of September. With the exception of visiting some family in the South for Labor Day.
It's been a good couple of weeks at home, which I spoke about in my last post. The last week, though, I have been working under the direction of my husband at a real professional job. I'm the painter. Let me tell you- I'm putting a lot of effort in to it, but I'm not a professional. I do my best work, yet I'm so slow. I worked outside, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and yesterday. I've been painting french doors. They are my favorite type of door, but not to paint! So, again, My husband and I were working on a project together, and I was there for work support (well, some), and moral support, too. I'm obviously not a paid employee, but I keep painting and helping while taking breaks. The heat just saps my energy. That, and I'm climbing up and down a ladder all day... drinking water during breaks. I've been reminded that I'm not exactly a laborer by trade. I'm active, but every morning last week, I woke up sore. The kind of soreness that fades once you get moving, but definitely sore. It's crazy how the body will adapt and get ready for it. Also, I have to psych myself into it too. I get up and get ready, so I don't lolligag around and talk myself out of it.
Ultimately, it's just another reminder of how thankful I am for a husband who has just an outstanding work ethic. He's not afraid of hard work or a hot day- or a crap ton of work. He just does it. Wow. I'm impressed. It reminded me that I should really be more appreciative of him and his gifts. Adam is a provider- and of course, his gifts come from God. There's just no other way to explain it. And, I'm thankful for it!
A few other fun things have been happening too. Ryan successfully made it through Church on Sunday, and she had fun. We'd been battling that after we returned home, she was a bit uncomfortable and she cried so much they had to call us on the monitor during the sermon. Another thing that we've been challenged by is bedtime... Ryan's bedtime, that is. Ryan has been having a breakdown before bed, and she screams and cries. It hasn't been pleasant since we got home. We tried leaving a light on. We tried doing the same thing as we did before we left. She's feeling separation anxiety. It can get pretty ugly though. And, it has upset me. Adam and I got on the same page, and we made a plan. Ryan is more likely to go to bed with Adam. With me, she just wants to cuddle. And, I have a lot of trouble with that at her bedtime. I get impatient. We turned the light off, now, and Adam puts her to sleep. And, it's working!! After all, we just keep persevering.
Since I haven't written much in a while, here's a list of a few other happenings in the last few weeks:
1. I hammer-drilled out the old morter in the exposed brick of our bathroom- single-handedly.
2. We had a cookout on Sunday- and I made quite the spread. Southern Hospitality at it's finest.
3. I made another peach pie and banana bread.
4. We've watched Monster's Inc. ALOT since it's Ryan's favorite movie now.
5. I started Beth Moore's A Woman's Heart Bible Study, and I'm being seriously enlightened by God.
6. I'm trying to plan out some final hikes for when we're in Wyoming in Sept or October.
7. I've made more of an effort to walk/bike instead of drive to the closest places of interest, like the library, Kmart, closest restaurants.
8. Ryan and I have been talking about "stories" (she'll make up her own), and her language continues to amaze me.
9. Life is so precious. I'm so thankful for my life.
And Lastly, My husband cut his hair!!!! After 5 years of dreadlocks... and, man, I love it! I got to cut it and wash it, and brush it out. It is so different! It's the shortest I've ever seen it, but I managed to keep it pretty long! I like looking at him lately!!
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
Saint Louis is Home
There's nothing like being at your own home, sleeping on your own bed, and enjoying all that is yours. Our house isn't extravagant, but it's ours, and we've put our mark on it.
We didn't have much of a plan on what to do when we returned home, but I definitely wanted to make some headway on a project that started the day after we closed on the house. Our downstairs first floor bathroom. It's been unusable since then. We had demolition to do, and we needed to work on our idea of what it would look like.
For 2 full days, we demo-ed the plaster and lathe walls. We were sweating profusely, debris falling from all around covering us with a layer of grime. We finally reached the framing and the brick wall. We exposed the guts of our house. We saw the reminats of a fire. We saw a man's work. These walls are old. Our house was built in 1927, and I'll never know all the stories.
There are little hand and feet prints in the concrete of our garage floor. There are wheat pennies falling from the walls. We are changing an old girl of a home. She's getting a make-over!
Once the demo was completed, we framed up what once was a pantry to our kitchen to add space for the bathroom. We swept and mopped the floors everyday after our work was completed because of the dust and stuff flying everywhere.
We didn't have much of a plan on what to do when we returned home, but I definitely wanted to make some headway on a project that started the day after we closed on the house. Our downstairs first floor bathroom. It's been unusable since then. We had demolition to do, and we needed to work on our idea of what it would look like.
For 2 full days, we demo-ed the plaster and lathe walls. We were sweating profusely, debris falling from all around covering us with a layer of grime. We finally reached the framing and the brick wall. We exposed the guts of our house. We saw the reminats of a fire. We saw a man's work. These walls are old. Our house was built in 1927, and I'll never know all the stories.
There are little hand and feet prints in the concrete of our garage floor. There are wheat pennies falling from the walls. We are changing an old girl of a home. She's getting a make-over!
Once the demo was completed, we framed up what once was a pantry to our kitchen to add space for the bathroom. We swept and mopped the floors everyday after our work was completed because of the dust and stuff flying everywhere.
We finally reached a point where we had small projects that were tedious but necessary. We installed a fan with a light fixture. We ran the duct work. I cleaned and sanded our claw foot tub. We cleaned the exposed brick wall with muratic acid. We put up drywall on the ceiling and walls. We started the walls with the first full coat of mud. We prepared the floor and leveled it for tile. We painted the claw foot tub. Black. We discussed the wall sconces. We moved the toilet, and changed the layout of the bathroom. We did new plumbing work. For a good week, we worked diligently on the bathroom.
We are seeing change. And this is the kind that is rewarding. The kind that has a remarkable feeling because we did it. The kind that when people walk in to one's home, they ask "did you pay someone to do this?" And the answer is no. It's the way we want it, and even though it can feel tedious, it will be completed correctly.
And, we are blessed to be able to invest in this whole-heartedly. It's a home, and it's for my family. It makes me feel thankful that I'm healthy and able to do work with my hands. I may not always remember that manual labor is the way of life for many people, including my husband, but it makes me appreciative and grateful for those artists who are able to do so. Jesus was a carpenter. And, although it's hard work, it's humbling to do it one's self.
So, amongst all the other "must-do's" in a day- like make food, take care over our daughter, sleep, run errands that are required for the other must-dos, we were busy. I watched a little girl for 4 days one week, and work went slowly. But, we were able to help those who helped us during a time of need. And, I was able to bake homemade wheat baguette, prepare lovely meals for those we love, and catch up with some friends.
The weather for us in St. Louis has again been incredible. We have had our windows open, wind blowing through our linen curtains, and we've played outside. Picking peaches at dusk in Illinois with our daughter was just one way we made the summer memorable while at home.
Adam and I also had a date which is so necessary if you have children!! I decided that I wanted it to be fun, and not so dressy. So, we played tennis at the court near our house- we rode our bicycles there and played. Then we rode to Maplewood on the bikes, and had a light dinner at Boogaloo on the strip. We rode back to Schlafly in the night air, and continued on our way to Failoni's Bar. A St. Louis classic Italian bar. It was such an amazing evening- we were just concerned about having fun and being together. It wasn't about getting dressed up- it was about being ourselves and talking. I hope I never forget that night.
Ultimately, I'm glad to be home. I always worry about the fact that I'm not working, but I pray that my hands to good work. And, they do. I made meals for friends that I delivered. I made 2 homemade peach pies as thank you's for people who bless us. I gave a working mom of 2 a meal to go, and I felt great about it. And, I don't expect anything in return. I even feel guilty mentioning it here because I'm not bragging. It's a good thing to do those small things for those-- and it is rewarding for me. I'm glad to do it.
I'm glad to be home. We're working hard. And, there's always something to be completed. A task at hand. I hope that you enjoyed reading this today. And, thanks to all of you who follow and read!
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Work It Out
Bummer! I haven't been able to hike like I was at the start of this adventure. I forgot the carrier at home, and this is more of a biking community. I can see why since they have 400 miles of bicycle trails around the Metro Des Moines Area. Pretty sweet, but not when you don't have a bike.
However, there's a gym at most every hotel where I can keep fitness a priority. I do have a weakness for ellipticals, but they don't do any different motions (obviously), and it doesn't really change the workout. But, I have a new favorite workout. Youtube! Oh man, my sister in laws introduced me to Tracy Anderson, and I'm impressed. She's amazing. I love her arm workouts, and I already see improvement.
On my post "A short story of weight," I confessed I have jiggly arms. Well, let me tell you, that is quickly, and I mean quickly, changing. There's no requirement for equipment other than your computer or your phone, and her workouts are usually filmed in 8-10 minute segments. The segments are perfect for a mom with a needy child...You can choose one to do and then it's over.
Her rhythm is different, and she's got some interesting moves. I've done her leg segments, and they aren't easy. I'm going to keep doing them for a while, and see what happens.
I would also like to do a 5k again soon, so I'm going to look and see if I can find one to do in the next week and a half. I'm down to 9 minute miles- which is getting pretty good. I'm worn out, but I can slow it down for 3 miles I think.
I do wish I was hiking in the mountains some days, but this has its own fun. I can hike in Missouri pretty much any weekend, so I'm embracing the change-up for the moment.
I just wanted to give those of you who want something different in your workout something fun to try. And, my arms are changing every day! I love it!
However, there's a gym at most every hotel where I can keep fitness a priority. I do have a weakness for ellipticals, but they don't do any different motions (obviously), and it doesn't really change the workout. But, I have a new favorite workout. Youtube! Oh man, my sister in laws introduced me to Tracy Anderson, and I'm impressed. She's amazing. I love her arm workouts, and I already see improvement.
On my post "A short story of weight," I confessed I have jiggly arms. Well, let me tell you, that is quickly, and I mean quickly, changing. There's no requirement for equipment other than your computer or your phone, and her workouts are usually filmed in 8-10 minute segments. The segments are perfect for a mom with a needy child...You can choose one to do and then it's over.
Her rhythm is different, and she's got some interesting moves. I've done her leg segments, and they aren't easy. I'm going to keep doing them for a while, and see what happens.
I would also like to do a 5k again soon, so I'm going to look and see if I can find one to do in the next week and a half. I'm down to 9 minute miles- which is getting pretty good. I'm worn out, but I can slow it down for 3 miles I think.
I do wish I was hiking in the mountains some days, but this has its own fun. I can hike in Missouri pretty much any weekend, so I'm embracing the change-up for the moment.
I just wanted to give those of you who want something different in your workout something fun to try. And, my arms are changing every day! I love it!
Extended Weekend
Oh My Gosh! I love Italian... culture, food, traditions. I've been to a few Italian festivals, and I love that Americans celebrate with festivals. I'm not so sure what Italians who still live in Italy think, but the festivals are entertaining events. We had some local brews and enjoyed some music on the lawn right near the Western Gateway Park. Our meal included Toasted Ravoli and a Grinder (pork) Sandwich and Tiramisu.
The music included some big band style songs and oldies like the "Girl from Ipanema." We attempted to swing dance with Ryan, and other people loved watching us. It was a valiant attempt, but it was really just for fun. I took a swing dance lesson a LONG time ago, and I remember a few moves. It was so fun to just play outside in glorious 70 degree weather. The live music was fun to watch, and the bocce ball was just as fascinating.
We had our dessert in the Sculpture park. I wanted to see it lit up. We had Tiramisu, which I happen to like a great deal, while Ryan walked an showed her Daddy the art. We made it to the "Nomade" which it just incredible to see anytime, and people watched. That piece of art is pretty famous, and even teenages made their way to see it and have a photo op. I met a bachelorette, and Ryan and I took a picture with her. I love seeing that. (P.S. The people in Des Moines are unusually friendly.)
On Sunday, Adam had to work, and we decided to plan a fancy dinner for our hardworking man. Ryan and I made a day of it. I decided that I missed Smoked Salmon, and I got some inspiration from Epicurious. I made my own little recipe which requires little cooking- obviously because I only use the electric skillet. It turned out simply divine. Here's the recipe:
Mini Polenta Cakes with Smoked Salmon, Honey Mustard, Sour Cream and Dill:
Ingredients:
1 pre-made package of Organic Polenta (I used Melissa's Brand)
1-2 packages of wild Smoked Salmon- not the pinky lox flat kind. Real filets of Smoked Salmon Peppered preferred
1/4 red onion, sliced paper thin
1 container of sweet hot honey mustard/ or plain honey mustard
1 container of sour cream
1 organic baby dill package
good Olive oil
Organic Butter
The key to good fried polenta cakes is enough oil. I used enough to have about a quarter inch at the bottom of the skillet, and I added a hefty tablespoon of butter for flavor.
Cut the Polenta into 1/4 inch patties.
Heat the oil/butter to high. Add polenta patties.
Cook until crispy, far golden brown.
If you prefer cold salmon, there's no need to warm it. Otherwise, I microwaved it for 15-20 seconds max- just to take the chill off.
Once your polenta is cooked, while it is still warm salt it moderately. If you have the peppercorn salmon, there's no need to pepper it too.
Time to assemble: Top the polenta cake with a slather of honey mustard, slivers of red onion, a piece of smoked salmon, a dollop of sour cream and garnish with a heaping pinch of fresh dill.
It's beautiful! Voila! Enjoy.
L'hotel delivered Sunday night! We shared with some of the guys Adam works with and I got a 10, and a 9.5. That's pretty darn good, if you ask me. We sided this small plate with a tomato, cucumber, and avocado salad. (just add a teaspoon of olive oil and salt & pepper- and you have your salad.)
Monday, was a rest and housekeeping day. I washed clothes, and we made a trip to the thrift store. I've been trying desperately to find a bicycle to rent with a burley/chariot or a child's seat. Well, that's one thing that Des Moines is lacking. I went to the Disabled Veteran's Thrift Shop, and they had some bikes, but they were lacking. Childs seats too for 10 bucks. I almost got the seat, but I couldn't bring myself to spend a pretty penny on a not so good bike. So, we found a tricycle!!
It's a kiddio brand, made in Germany, traditional trike in primary colors. Ryan loves it! It was going to be her first real biking adventure, so we went to Copper Creek and I walked while she rode her new trike.
Adoreable!
We had a great weekend, and we're going back home to St. Louis soon. It's not completely set up for date of departure, but we're close. It'll be nice to see the ol' homestead, and we'll probably work on our house. It'll be a good August.
The music included some big band style songs and oldies like the "Girl from Ipanema." We attempted to swing dance with Ryan, and other people loved watching us. It was a valiant attempt, but it was really just for fun. I took a swing dance lesson a LONG time ago, and I remember a few moves. It was so fun to just play outside in glorious 70 degree weather. The live music was fun to watch, and the bocce ball was just as fascinating.
We had our dessert in the Sculpture park. I wanted to see it lit up. We had Tiramisu, which I happen to like a great deal, while Ryan walked an showed her Daddy the art. We made it to the "Nomade" which it just incredible to see anytime, and people watched. That piece of art is pretty famous, and even teenages made their way to see it and have a photo op. I met a bachelorette, and Ryan and I took a picture with her. I love seeing that. (P.S. The people in Des Moines are unusually friendly.)
On Sunday, Adam had to work, and we decided to plan a fancy dinner for our hardworking man. Ryan and I made a day of it. I decided that I missed Smoked Salmon, and I got some inspiration from Epicurious. I made my own little recipe which requires little cooking- obviously because I only use the electric skillet. It turned out simply divine. Here's the recipe:
Mini Polenta Cakes with Smoked Salmon, Honey Mustard, Sour Cream and Dill:
Ingredients:
1 pre-made package of Organic Polenta (I used Melissa's Brand)
1-2 packages of wild Smoked Salmon- not the pinky lox flat kind. Real filets of Smoked Salmon Peppered preferred
1/4 red onion, sliced paper thin
1 container of sweet hot honey mustard/ or plain honey mustard
1 container of sour cream
1 organic baby dill package
good Olive oil
Organic Butter
The key to good fried polenta cakes is enough oil. I used enough to have about a quarter inch at the bottom of the skillet, and I added a hefty tablespoon of butter for flavor.
Cut the Polenta into 1/4 inch patties.
Heat the oil/butter to high. Add polenta patties.
Cook until crispy, far golden brown.
If you prefer cold salmon, there's no need to warm it. Otherwise, I microwaved it for 15-20 seconds max- just to take the chill off.
Once your polenta is cooked, while it is still warm salt it moderately. If you have the peppercorn salmon, there's no need to pepper it too.
Time to assemble: Top the polenta cake with a slather of honey mustard, slivers of red onion, a piece of smoked salmon, a dollop of sour cream and garnish with a heaping pinch of fresh dill.
It's beautiful! Voila! Enjoy.
L'hotel delivered Sunday night! We shared with some of the guys Adam works with and I got a 10, and a 9.5. That's pretty darn good, if you ask me. We sided this small plate with a tomato, cucumber, and avocado salad. (just add a teaspoon of olive oil and salt & pepper- and you have your salad.)
Monday, was a rest and housekeeping day. I washed clothes, and we made a trip to the thrift store. I've been trying desperately to find a bicycle to rent with a burley/chariot or a child's seat. Well, that's one thing that Des Moines is lacking. I went to the Disabled Veteran's Thrift Shop, and they had some bikes, but they were lacking. Childs seats too for 10 bucks. I almost got the seat, but I couldn't bring myself to spend a pretty penny on a not so good bike. So, we found a tricycle!!
It's a kiddio brand, made in Germany, traditional trike in primary colors. Ryan loves it! It was going to be her first real biking adventure, so we went to Copper Creek and I walked while she rode her new trike.
Adoreable!
We had a great weekend, and we're going back home to St. Louis soon. It's not completely set up for date of departure, but we're close. It'll be nice to see the ol' homestead, and we'll probably work on our house. It'll be a good August.
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